One of the most widely read scriptures at weddings is 1 Corinthians 13. It’s all about love. Fitting right? It talks about love being patient, not envious, not boastful. It doesn’t demand it’s own way. It doesn’t give up or lose hope. Love endures all circumstances. Paul, the author of these words, also talks about how we can deceive ourselves by thinking some actions are worthwhile and amazing such as prophecy or great knowledge. He says however, that all these are pointless if they’re not accompanied with love.
Why is scripture read so much? I use to think it was because it has the most concentrated and obvious message of love of any place in the Bible. It’s an obvious choice for those committing to LOVE each other forever. Today, I think I realized a better reason and probably the truth behind this popular choice. Love is hard. Love is difficult to show, act out, live in, and offer. Love is hard even if you’ve pledged to LOVE someone forever. People give rings to remember this commitment but that’s a pledge between two people who have thought long and hard about how they want and hope to love forever. What about those other people? I don’t have a ring with anyone; I’m not “pledged” to anyone.
1 Cor. 13 is not just a wedding scripture. Paul didn’t designate these words simply for special moments of dedication, which will be followed by the cutting of the cake. Paul wrote these for the pledged and unpledged for this day and everyday. He says love is hard always and here’s why. We think it’s these things: being really good at something or telling people about God or simple having really deep faith. Those are good but they’re not love. Love is suppose to permeate those things as if it’s part of the essence of those actions and thoughts.
Lately, I’ve been fairly busy, running (literally at times) from one activity to another. I do my best to be prepared and then be present in the moment. But I’m not sure I can say love is infused in all these moments. I work on homework but love is necessarily flowing out of my pen- should I dot my i's with hearts? I constantly work with people who are trying to improve their abilities and meet goals and their potential. I try to help them in their efforts with the right words and demonstration but offering my superior skill and knowledge will only help them superficially. How do I love them, especially when I’m frustrated by a perceived lack of desire or effort? In the end, my preparations have to be soaked in love as much as my participation. I say I want people to grow but complaints behind their back or frustrations in my heart will block any waves from an ocean of love.
I also realize that love has to be offered personally. I can boast in my efforts but I do not really love myself when I do that. To love unconditionally means without need for merit. Am I willing to love myself despite imperfections? I better because as a human, imperfection is a part of my nature. But love is part of my nature, too.
Perhaps Paul wrote this chapter to give us hope that even our imperfections can be infused with love. Perhaps the goal is to move beyond our great abilities or limitations and let love guide our thoughts, words and actions in a way that these other things dim in comparison. I’m still trying to figure out how that works exactly, but knowing goal will point me in the right direction and guide my footsteps.
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